Want to hear more from the actors and creators of your favorite shows and films? Subscribe to The Cinema Spot on YouTube for all of our upcoming interviews!
Something about me? I have been a nerdy cinephile for as long as I can remember. Putting the two together is living my best life. That notwithstanding, I was born to express, not to impress, so I blog because I don't have friends. In other news, I like hashtags because they look like waffles, prefer my puns intended, and I always give 100% unless I'm donating blood. Thanks for reading.
Ezra Miller has what many would consider a “charmed life.” The Wyckoff, New Jersey native is a superhero! What could be better than that? Yet, if you chronicle The Flash’s life for the past few years, he’s starting to believe all that “I can outrun anything” crap. According to a recent professional photo, taken by Hawaii Island Police, his pace has been pedestrian at best.
Miller, 29, may understand what it means to exhibit “Speed Force,” but dude can’t seem to outrun the long arm of the law. Furthermore, he exhibits a behavior to tell the world that he has Superman’s powers by dodging speeding bullets and still has a damn job at Warner Bros. Discovery (WBD) and DC Comics.
His most recent fiasco was in Waterbury, Vermont, near Ezra Miller’s Stamford, Connecticut home this past May. According to the official statement from the local police, Miller broke into the empty house and stole “several bottles of alcohol” and was charged with “the offense of felony burglary into an unoccupied dwelling.”
It’s not like he can’t afford some Mad Dog 20/20 or Strawberry Hill at the local convenience store. No, for Ezra Miller, it’s about living badass, and he wanted to get turnt to quench his thirst. To wit, the new authority trust at WBD has said bupkus! That tone-deaf silence has forced vexed fans of the besieged brand to speak out and call for Miller’s tail to be fired as The Flash.
Should that happen?
Ezra Miller’s Trail of Tears
(Credit: Steve Dietl/Coup d’Etat Dilms/IFC Films)
Oh no. Don’t get it twisted by that picture. Ezra feels just fine. Meanwhile, the rest of us ask Baby Jesus, Santa Claus, and a couple of ceramic Buddhas to help WBD change this mess and finally make a DCEU we can all be proud to watch.
David Zaslav has assured everyone (including his shareholders looking for a $3 billion savings this year) that he will. But, uh, not so much. Let’s go on a road trip, and you be the judge…
Getting Choked Up in Iceland, April 2020
Ezra is enjoying global travel by revisiting where Zack Snyder took the team in Iceland. Maybe. Well, he was in Reykjavik when the arctic brouhaha took place. The bad boy of “Justice” was caught on camera shouting, “Oh, you wanna’ fight? That’s what you wanna’ do?”
Oh yeah. Blowing up at a woman. Since chivalry is dead in that mind, Miller grabs her by the throat and hurls her butt to the beer-stained and peanut shell-ridden floor. You stay classy, Flashy.
Ezra Miller Meets a “Klan” of Friends, January 2022
(Credit: PageSix/WireImage)
The Flash was speeding along an hour north of Wilmington, North Carolina. He’s enjoying the sights, sounds, and random cross-burning festivities. Something happened in the Boonies because Ezra felt inspired to take on the Beulaville chapter of the KKK via Instagram. [Cue “Dueling Banjos“]
Just in case, our speedy superhero insisted it was “no joke!”
The now-deleted post reads:
Look, if y’all want to die, I suggest killing yourselves with your own guns, okay? Otherwise, keep doing exactly what you’re doing right now — and you know what I am talking about — then, you know, we’ll do it for you, if that’s really what you want. Talk to you soon, bye.
And if those @$$-backward hillbillies weren’t sure who targeted them, Ezra was sporting a nice Flash ring, so there’s that.
Hawaii Five-Oh, WTF Dude, March 2022
Another bar, another issue for Ezra Miller. Once in the warm embrace of the Hawaii PD, the world was told, “Miller was arrested and charged on [disorderly conduct and harassment]. Bail was $500.”
Upon leaving the Hilo Karaoke Bar, Ezra was also a little vocal about police officers using the wrong pronouns for them and decided to give the cops a lesson on constitutional law and the perils of transgender nonbinary bigotry. Good luck with that message getting through.
Digging Deeper, March 2022
More fun in Hawaii, according to the Associated Press. Miller busts into a couple’s bedroom to steal their passports and wallets. Based on affidavits, Ezra yelled at the male victim, “I will bury you and your slut wife!” A restraining order was filed but later dropped. O-kay?
Chair-ish the Love, April 2022
A month later, the transgender binary individual of the hour was at a private party. Something happened to piss off Ezra, as a fly landed in those vicious eyelashes or something. CRASH! A chair flies across the room, hitting a 26-year-old woman and leaving a half-inch gash on her forehead. It was 1:30 a.m. Three hours later, Ezra gets bailed out for second-degree assault.
Bad Influence, June 2022
(Credit: Neilson Barnard/Getty Images)
In 2016, Ezra Miller was shacking up at Standing Rock Reservation in North Dakota. This is where he met Tokata Iron Eyes. The actor was 23. The young lady was 12. Allegedly, Flash Miller supplied her with booze, pills, and hippie lettuce.
A year later, Miller flew her to London to visit filming Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. Another year later, Miller got involved in Tokata’s private school and allegedly coaxed her into quitting, which she did in 2021.
So, the parents asked for a court protective order claiming Ezra “used violence, intimidation, the threat of violence, fear, paranoia, delusions, and drugs to hold sway over a young adolescent.” Oh, and Ezra encouraged Tokata to by the mononym of “Gibson” because that’s not strange.
It’s a seriously Lifetime real-life crime movie or something. Just weird.
Dennis (and Ezra) the Menace, June 2022
This involves Miller, a mother, a neighbor, and a 12-year-old nonbinary child. Yeah, this won’t go well.
In the quaint town of Greenfield, Massachusetts, something was afoot. A temporary harassment prevention order was filed against Ezra, who was blamed for “menacing the family and acting inappropriately” toward the youngster.
FYI: The neighbor is in a band with some friends of Flash. So, what was the fuss? Bullying? Fashion police? Arguing over Squid Game? No, it was Parcheesi. You know? The board game?
During game night, Miller noted Parcheesi was rooted in Rastafarian culture. The neighbor questioned the authority of the claim, to which screaming ensued, someone brandished a gun, yelling, “talking like that could get you into a really serious situation.”
Damn. Calm down. Checkers anyone? For those keeping score at home, Parcheesi hails from India around 4 A.D. Just a wee bit off there, Ezra Marley.
FarmVille, June 2022
Ezra Miller enjoys the countryside with all these outdoor activities in remote, clandestine locations, like a farm in Vermont? Living inside the remote shack were a 25-year-old mother and her three kids–ages one through five. Distant neighbors allegedly saw them in the barn and knew who owned it.
That’s when the authorities were notified. Fearing for the family’s safety around “unattended guns” and witnessed the “one-year-old chewing on a loose bullet.” The funny part is, guess where this family met Ezra?
Hilo, Hawaii. Sigh.
Thirsty for Attention, August 2022
We’ve already discussed this one. Granted, it doesn’t matter how many times the break-in for booze is bandied about. What in the red and yellow hell was Flash thinking?!
Your Move, WBD
(Credit: David Buchan/Variety/REX/Shutterstock)
“The Zas” is supposed to rescue the DC Comics/Warner Bros. partnership from looking like a three-legged race up a hill. They have more WTF moments than a Charlie Sheen interview. (“Tiger blood,” anyone?) So, down comforter vest boy here is on the case. He’s made cuts, brought in Alan Horn, created some buzz, and poured kerosene on $90 million and lit Batgirl on fire.
Yet, after all that mess, Ezra Miller still has a job and movie set to jump-start the DCEU.
We understand he has a metric ton of weight on his cozy shoulders, and The Flash was set to open a door to the DC Multiverse. Yet, right is right. You cannot reward that laundry list of bat-ess crazy behavior. Well, you can, technically. You’re the man over there, but seriously?!
The misanthrope noob owns a barn in Vermont, starts fights with undesirable folks, and has a real weed in his behind about the Aloha state. If someone knows anyone at WBD, quickly get this punch list of unhinged abnormality to the HQ. Otherwise, we’re liable to get another Catwoman, Steel, or Batnipples, And who the hell wants any of that?!
Something about me? I have been a nerdy cinephile for as long as I can remember. Putting the two together is living my best life. That notwithstanding, I was born to express, not to impress, so I blog because I don't have friends. In other news, I like hashtags because they look like waffles, prefer my puns intended, and I always give 100% unless I'm donating blood. Thanks for reading.
This article was edited by Zach Smith.