Want to hear more from the actors and creators of your favorite shows and films? Subscribe to The Cinema Spot on YouTube for all of our upcoming interviews!
Sometimes I write things, but mostly I watch movies.
Borderlands is the latest in a long line of video game adaptations. And while video game adaptions have been on the upswing thanks to the likes of Arcane, Sonic the Hedgehog, and Fallout, Borderlands reminds us that for a long time, video game movies were poor cash-in attempts on existing intellectual property.
Borderlands is directed and written by Eli Roth (Thanksgiving, Hostel) along with an additional writing credit by Joe Crombie (Love, Death & Robots). Cate Blanchett stars as Lilith along with Ariana Greenblatt as Tiny Tina, Kevin Hart as Roland, Jamie Lee Curtis as Dr. Patricia Tennis, Jack Black as the voice of Claptrap, and Florian Munteanu as Krieg.
Despite its star-studded cast, Borderlands is a misfire on practically every level. It’s hard to tell what exactly is wrong with Borderlands because it’s almost every aspect. From the writing to the cinematography to the action choreography to the musical composition, there are a few redeeming qualities to be found.
A Cast That Tries
Perhaps the only saving graces of the movie are Blanchett and Greenblatt. Yet, even they can barely save it. Both of these actors make the material somewhat bearable. Still, with such generic writing, there is only so much they can do.
Despite their best efforts, the rest of the cast really drags them. Kevin Hart, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Edgar Ramirez in particular have phoned in their performances. As a whole, the entire cast has little to no chemistry. It is painful to watch what should be heartfelt moments delivered with no energy or passion. The characters are like lifeless non-playable characters—more commonly known on the Internet as “NPCs”—who regurgitate cliche dialogue in a vain attempt to get an audience to care.
Speaking of the writing, the Borderlands game series has never been known for great writing. Although, it was at least funny if a bit edgy. However, any edge has been sanded off in pursuit of that magical blockbuster PG-13 rating. This leaves the film with pretty much nothing but jokes that corporate shareholders think people will find funny and shocking. With that said, there are a handful of moments where I laughed. Shoutout to Benjamin Byron Davis who plays Marcus, the bus driver. His character and the handful of jokes he gets are what accounted for most of these laughs.
Generic and Lifeless
Narratively, I can barely tell you what happens. A lot of exposition is delivered in drab voiceovers from Lilith. It is some vague nonsense about finding a vault that contains powerful and bountiful resources that can only be opened by the “daughter of Eridia”. Lilith is sent to save Tiny Tina, who is believed to be the key to the vault. Hijinks and chaos ensue as they encounter the rest of the cast.
At its worst, Borderlands is dull and forgettable. At its best, the movie is a pale imitation of better movies that you wish you were watching instead. It attempts to recapture the magic of James Gunn’s Guardians of the Galaxy film series and at times the Mad Max franchise. One section early on echoes the canyon chase from 2015’s Mad Max: Fury Road but without the strong direction, choreography, and energy of that scene.
For a movie that cost upwards of $100 million, Borderlands does not look it. It feels like most of the movie was shot in a quarry or cheaply built sets. Not only that but the visual effects are rarely good. Add in cheap cosplay-looking costumes, and you get a movie that feels like it was made with no care or passion.
In the end, Borderlands is a waste of hundreds of millions of dollars, people’s time and talent, and is one of the worst blockbusters in recent memory. I beg you not to waste your time and skip this movie. This isn’t a movie that is “not so bad that it’s good”; it’s just plain bad.
Score: 1/5 stars
Be sure to check back with The Cinema Spot for more action, science-fiction, and video game movie reviews! And check out our Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Letterboxd!
Sometimes I write things, but mostly I watch movies.
This article was edited by John Tangalin.